When was the last time you were wrong? Think hard…wait….you’re never wrong! Everything you say is so well thought out and you know everything about everything! Oh yeah, that’s totally me; and probably 70% of the general population. Don’t shake your head and mumble about how you admit when you’re wrong, blah blah blah. If you’re anything like me you only admit to it after an hour long Google session and then you still have a thought in the back of your mind floating around whispering that the Doctors at WebMD MUST be idiots. I blame the argument on the fact that whomever I’m arguing with just can’t accept the fact that they are indeed inferior to my intellect (what a twisted wonderful little mind I have) and then I stick up my nose and walk away…with new knowledge that I lacked prior to my googling and somehow a heightened sense of self, even though I just made at total ass of myself. Do I feel bad about this? Meh. Not really. It’s just how I am and I’ve accepted the fact that it’s not right and probably a bit off putting to normal human beings but hey…it makes me…well, it makes me an ass. I do however attempt to balance it out with genuine compassion and concern for other people (it makes me feel a little less like a bad person).
In the above scenario, I was clearly wrong yet I blamed the other person for the whole entire argument and that was enough for me to convince myself that I’m not as crazy and hard headed as they suggested via their passive aggressive comments. Obviously I am crazy and hard headed …but it’s definitely their fault. It’s so much easier to justify things if we’re not the ones to blame. Recently I heard a story about a woman seeing a man behind her husband’s back, whether or not there is cheating involved I couldn’t tell you. Her reasoning for seeing this other gentleman was the fact that her husband was cheating on her repetitively. As soon as my friend who was explaining the situation to me let that slip out of her lips I immediately called bullshit. I was absolutely disgusted…and slightly sympathetic. For starters, anyone who uses “2 wrongs make a right” to make something okay has some serious pent up sadistic issues going on. If she was actually being cheated on, she’s:
A) An idiot for being with a man who she knows is running around with every Tonya, Denise and Harriet.
B) A complete heartless Bitch for wanting to inflict pain on someone she “loves” enough to put aside his infidelity because at this point she should know how bad it hurts to be treated as the cow that isn’t providing the milk.
She straight up blamed her husband for her lack of self control. That’s way cold, Ice Queen. I bet it helped her sleep better at night, though. When you can tell yourself that it’s not something that you’re lacking that’s making you do bad things then they tend to be much easier to cope with and continue doing. The cold hard fact is, we’re all wrong at some point and our first reaction will be to blame someone else for why we’re wrong instead of stepping back and saying, “I made a mistake, my bad”. Why are you doing badly in school? Of course it’s because you’re teachers suck! It has absolutely nothing to do with the fact that you go home and sit on your teenage rear end instead of studying or putting in effort and then after 10 hours a night of black op’s it’s most definitely the teacher’s fault that you are tired and can’t focus because they’re boring. You’ll go far, kid. Luckily in the real world if you were sucking your boss would look at you, tell you he doesn’t care how much trouble you have at home and give you a box to pack your desk with… or a complimentary Big Mac depending on how far out of high school you made it after sleeping through math.
So life has you down, your baby Daddy is a total loser, you’re having trouble finding work (yet having no trouble finding people to buy your drinks while you’re out “job hunting”) This is all his fault, damn men. He swore he’d be there for you and promised he’d take care of his kid so now it’s his fault you need to go out to de-stress yourself every night of the week and just need a break. No ma’am. The only person responsible for one’s problems is one’s self. In the real world a logical thinking person would realize that fairy tales are made for paper, not your facebook about me. Sure no one wants to see a relationship go down the drain or a family fall apart, but it happens. It could happen to you, it could happen to me. You can’t blame your problems on the fact that you let yourself naively think that you’re the exception to the rule. At the end of the day all you can do is say you tried your best and then move on because staying stuck in neutral isn’t going to do much for you. If you’re not the best parent, partner or friend you can be it’s because you choose not to be, not because you’re in an impossible situation. Point that finger right back at your chest. Sure the guy may be a real POS but you run that risk every time you have sex with him, no one put a gun to your head…unless it was rape, in which case I am terribly sorry and I hope you’re either in therapy or coping well, I couldn’t even imagine. But for those who are just plain out not thinking about cause and effect, remember it takes 2 to tango, he wasn’t so bad while he was impregnating you now was he? And if he cheats on you, the same applies to him, it’s not your fault he’s a total waste of oxygen and never let him tell you otherwise. And just to touch the subject in case you didn’t know…sex can lead to a baby, sure it feels good without a condom but I promise you that condom feels a lot better than the constant stress of being a single parent for possibly the next 18 years. Spread the word because apparently it’s a misconception that sex and babies are correlated, those darn storks are just dropping them off left and right.
I know that blame is hard to swallow. Like I stated earlier, I do it, we all do it and its part of being human. Sometimes life gets us down or we’re just flat out wrong but instead of pointing at the guy next to you saying that you’ve never seen that bong before in your life as the cops are searching your car why don’t you just say, “alright, that’s my bag of weed…in hindsight it was a bad idea to smoke the bong in the car while driving naked, but I get it, cuff me…but let me have just one more hit..” Now if you make it through that without getting tasered I promise you you’ll feel better about the situation, because you actually learned something from it. As easy as it is to blame all our problems on each other and on our situations, who wants to have some silly word running their lives? Not me. Next time you’re arguing or trying to justify why you thought it was okay to let your neighbor’s cat play with a live grenade stop for a moment and think….are you going to blame cable T.V. or are you going to tell your neighbor you’re just glad that cat isn’t shitting on your porch anymore? Who’s really to blame…
Dang always hating on black ops!
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